A Critique of the General Synod of the Church of England
Rant Number 563 21/11/13
One day, while bowing deeply to Queen Elizabeth I, Edward de Vere, Earl of Oxford, let off a loud fart. That made him so ashamed that he went into exile for seven years. On his return, Elizabeth welcomed back at court the still abashed nobleman, saying: ‘My Lord, don’t worry: I forgot the fart.’
What the Queen meant of course was that she forgave the Earl. His gross act had been involuntary. Had she suspected the fart was deliberate, Elizabeth would not have been amused. Disrespect to her person she never tolerated. She was, after all, a Tudor – not the meekest of Royal dynasties.
Disrespect and the Anglican Church - far-fetched connection? Not really. The governing body of Anglicanism, the General Synod, provides the offending link. Not because it is largely composed of old and not so old farts, male and female, but because of the evil it does. ‘O Lord, prevent the Synod for causing too much mischief’, the priest used to pray. No more. That sad organisation is past praying for. Voting for having female bishops – a ruinous break with orthodox Christianity – is the latest in a long chain of actions profoundly disrespectful to God. Another betrayal of that Biblical faith the Anglican Church always claimed to be based on.
‘The Church of England was flawed from its inception!’ you will say. Incontrovertible. No church is perfect but Anglicanism – a body which owes its origins to the adulterous lusts of a syphilitic tyrant, a cruel murderer of countless holy men and women – especially so. Still, the key problem is Protestantism. As Kierkegaard pointed out, when he rebelled against the Pope Luther also made being a Christian easier. Whether he meant it or not, he slackened the impact of Christian demands. ‘A true reformer should have tightened them’, Kierkegaard claimed. Whenever the Eternal is present, the cause becomes harder. Instead it is a characteristic of the Temporal, the old Adam, of mere humanity to want things, the obligations of the Faith to become lighter, easier. That is a sign that it is never the will of God which is at work but man’s.
In her pathetic, childish and self-defeating pursuit of courting a heedless and godless society, the Anglican Church has broken with 2000 years of Christian tradition over Holy Orders. A gesture of utter disrespect for its sacred, ancient formularies. The Western world affirms gender equality? So must the Church. Otherwise people will not take us seriously, they will not darken the church door, the argument went. The proof of the pudding is in the eating, though. Since females were ordained in 1993, the Church’s decline into irrelevance has continued apace. Nor have the egalitarian masses starting pouring in. The old, dreary Victorian buildings remain empty. Farting in the face of Sacred Tradition has not paid off. Quite a lesson, eh?
The Synod consists of three houses or chambers. Laity, Clergy and Bishops. Three problems. Anglican clergy love to dress up in their canonical vestments. The High Church, the effete, bells and smells brigade, especially. They too often are the ‘queens’ of the parish. The true badges of apostolicity, however, are not prelatical. Certainly not gorgeous dalmatics, embroidered stoles and laced cottas. They are the painful ones worn by St Paul: poverty, nakedness, troubles, persecution, sufferings – an apostle bears those marks on his flesh. Vicars show no inclination towards them. (Neither do I, ostensibly, but of my terrible sufferings I will not boast.)
As to Bishops. Their shenanigans tempt me to quote a crusty Protestant divine: ‘the Devil was the first Bishop’. Actually, he was wrong. The Devil is smart but the Bishops are fools. How else would you judge their recent initiative, I mean getting into bed with that charming organisation, Stonewall, on a campaign in schools about gays? As the pagans used to say: ‘Verily, those whom the gods wish to destroy, they first drive mad.’
The laity. The ordinary parish people. I once hoped they were the sounder ones, the closer to the Gospel. An illusion. It is primarily the pastors’ fault if they do not feed Christ’s flock with proper, Biblical sermons and teachings but these sheep bear their own guilt. A feeble and permissive church is actually very convenient to many people. It allows them to feel free to follow their own fads and drives, never being told what being a follower of Christ actually entails. Similarly, a school chaplain once told me: ‘The boys like the Anglican Church. They are reassured when they never get told: “This is wrong. It is against the will of God”. She permits them to sleep around and…other things. It is a perfect church for Laodiceans…’
King Charles I, a great wit, was ex officio supreme governor of the Church of England. He harboured no illusion as to the nature of his church. ‘Just as Presbyterianism is no suitable religion for a gentleman, Anglicanism is no fit religion for a Christian’, he quipped. God’s wonderful grace, however, does perform miracles. It can change and redeem even the lowest scoundrels, the most corrupt instruments. Despite its dubious beginnings, the Church has represented basic Christianity to a large section of the English nation. The Church has shared in the worldwide adventure, the phenomenal expansion of the English race throughout the globe. Moreover, though she can’t compare with the fervent holiness of the RC and Eastern Churches, the C of E has produced a few saints, perhaps even martyrs. I have known one of them. Canon David Jackson was his name. Once Vicar of Holy Trinity, Clapham. A gentleman, a saint, a true man of God he was, I tell you.
Queen Elizabeth I forgave the fart. The Earl did not mean it. Will God forgive the Church of England her stupidity and apostasy? Perhaps on the assumption the Synod bunch do not mean it, they don’t realise the mischief they are doing? If Socrates was right, if sin is ignorance and no one hence sins voluntarily, maybe…yes. If not, God is not mocked. He will repay.
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