FATHER FRANK’S RANTS - Jesus’ Spouse

Rant Number 508     3 October 2012

‘...As regards women, protect yourselves against them by fasting and prayer’, Jesus said to the disciples.

Would a man who speaks like that be likely to be married? I think not. (Unless perhaps he spoke from jaundiced personal experience.) Of course, you will not find Jesus saying those words in the Gospels. Rather, they are narrated by the great Muslim mystic al-Ghazali. And other Islamic authorities. Along with many other putative sayings, traditions and legends about the Christ of Islam. Quite juicy stuff, the priest admits...

Was there ever a Mrs Jesus of Nazareth? A Coptic papyrus recently turned up has the Messiah referring to ‘my wife’. (Thank God it does not say ‘my partner’.) Probably a forgery, say the experts. Harvard’s Karen King wonders whether the full, missing sentence might have run ‘my wife is the Church’. A sentiment consonant with the New Testament, in which Christ’s love for the Church is likened to a husband’s love for his spouse. Indeed, some Church Fathers claimed that Jesus’ bride was the Church. That, however, is theology, not history. The Church, wonderful as she is, is not quite a flesh-and-blood spouse. Similarly, to invoke a ‘spiritual wife’ does not satisfy. You can think of some vital differences...

If Jesus had a wife, why don’t the Gospels mention her? His brothers, for example, appear in St Mark’s.  Would a wife have been too embarrassing? But the possibility of Jesus being mad is also pretty damning and yet St Mark reports the Messiah’s relatives asserting exactly that (3:21). If there was a wife around, why doctor her out of the sacred text?

Ms. King – surprise, surprise - speculates about a not-so-hidden Church conspiracy, a la Da Vinci Code. Jesus was, amongst other things, a rabbi and rabbis normally were married but later the Church began to push asceticism, self-denial as a Christian ideal.  A wife would militate against that, hence Mrs Jesus had to be expunged from the Gospels.

The Christ of Islam, however, comes to the rescue. (My Muslim friends are going to hate this but...amicus Plato sed magis amica veritas.) Islamic texts, from the Qur’an to theahadith, to the legends and stories I have perused, breathe not a word about a Jesus’ wife. Which is interesting, because Islam teaches that Jesus was a Prophet and indeed a remarkable human being  - a virgin’s son, speaking from the cradle, performing miracles, healing, even raising the dead – and yet still an ordinary man. All of Jesus’ marvels were accomplished not by supernatural powers of his own but ‘by God’s permission’, the Qur’an says. It insists repeatedly that God does not have a son. It and other Muslim texts constantly controvert Christian claims to the contrary. Pointing out a Jesus’ spouse would have come very handy: ‘See, o thick-headed Christians! The Messiah truly was a man like all others. He even had a wife!’ Yet, the Islamic tradition is silent about Mrs Jesus, just like the Gospels are. Because, you may perhaps conclude, there was never such a person.

Asceticism is one of the bogeys of our epoch. An age obsessed with public expressions of Eros in its manifold, weird variations cannot understand what previous times found so valuable and commendable: a higher vocation. An ascetic, celibate Jesus is intolerable, especially to some Protestant Christians. ‘Has God given you a wife?’ once asked me Revd. Sandy Millars, of Holy Trinity Brompton fame. ‘No, Sandy. Like Jesus, I haven’t got a wife’, I shot back. It got me a funny look.

Once again, Islam helps. The Jesus sayings culled from al-Ghazali and other worthies were divided by the Revd James Robson into various categories. One is asceticism. The Messiah could embrace poverty, self-renunciation, hunger, all that. Jesus also turns away from a tent in which there is a woman, just like he avoids a cave with a lion in it. Abstinence rules OK, then. However, God promises the Messiah on Resurrection Day a wedding feast lasting 4000 years, with ‘a hundred houris’. Something to look forward to, no doubt.

Curiously, the Islamic tradition contrasts St John the Baptist with Jesus. The Gospels make it clear that John was indeed an ascetic. He dwelled in the wilderness, wearing rough clothes and feeding on wild honey. Jesus, on the other hand went to parties, drank wine, rubbed shoulders with bad people and was convivial. The Muslim John, however, sounds more life-affirming than Jesus. The Baptist upbraids the Messiah for not controlling his anger. Odd.

Was the Jesus of the Gospels then not at all into self-denial? Well, he clearly had an ascetic streak, for example when fasting 40 days and 40 nights in the wilderness. (Even this poor priest, definitely not into self-mortifications, has occasional bouts of asceticism.)  It is reasonable to assume that Jesus could embrace aspects of both ways of life, when his ministry demanded it.

Misogyny is almost impossible for Semites. The presence and company of women is closely intertwined with the lives of the men, the peoples of the Book. The Gospels are pellucidly clear: Jesus had plenty of women followers. They ministered unto him and provided for his daily needs, as indeed they should have. Sex, however, was only permissible in legally established forms, within marriage and the like. Let us be clear about it: the idea of a holy man like Jesus having ‘casual sex’ outside marriage, indulging in girl friends and such absurdities, is religiously self-contradictory. Any such fornicating person would not be a Prophet but a pig. Maybe a happy pig but a pig nevertheless, like the throngs of contented neo-pagans now infesting what used to be called Christendom.

Still, there remains a mystery about the sentimental life of Christ. Christian dogma affirms both his divinity and his humanity, not confused but harmoniously coexisting. Christ as a man potentially felt like any other man. He was certainly no eunuch. Is it possible that...

Forgive me, o Lord!

Revd Frank Julian Gelli